How To Define Self-Love

As the issue of self-love is something that crops up repeatedly with my clients, I felt it worth shedding some light on the subject. You see, many people are under the impression that it’s selfish to consider your own needs before anybody else’s.

However, at this crazy time of the year, it’s worth stopping for a moment to ponder some old-fashioned sayings and advice:


“To thine own self be true.” – William Shakespeare

Love thy neighbour, as thyself.” – The Bible

Loving yourself isn’t vanity. It’s sanity!” – Katrina Mayer

Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on.” – Maxwell Maltz

Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.

Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.” Eleanor Roosevelt

Nothing, makes a person happier than having a happy heart.” Roy T. Bennett


Working women, in particular, often deal with an enormous amount of misplaced guilt, and will put their family’s requirements too far ahead of their own needs. This can actually backfire in a number of ways because if one’s own needs for rest and recreation are ignored, it will ultimately lead to health problems further down the track.

Similarly men, who have a tendency to workaholism and an inability to pay attention to their own inner voice, often deprive themselves of their right to enjoy a healthy work/life balance.

But hey! I’m not telling you anything new. It’s merely a reminder, as we approach the end of year, to at least think about refraining from buying into all the hype and busy-ness associated with Christmas.

I can hear a few sighs here!

But, what about if you just stopped for a moment, to take stock of what is necessary and productive to your own existence, and weighed up the consequences of trying to cram less important tasks into an already tight timeframe?

I guarantee you will be able to drop off at least one or two things. Business socialising that you can’t stand, events you don’t enjoy where you feel obligated, stuff that your kids don’t need to do, work that can wait…

Drop the guilt.

Schedule a new flight path.